To Her
by Wordgawk
Summary: Mary or Maria, which lady does James choose? He has choice, but he also has many thoughts inside that head of his.


Author's note: While blowing off dust from an archive of stories, this SH2 one was one of them I thought I'd post up. The James and Maria pairing has an intriguing dynamic and the scene this story takes place in is one of my favorites. Though Maria and James aren't mine but are Konami's, it's still fun to mess around with them! Please R and R!

* * *

To Her

In spite of being trapped behind prison bars, Maria pulled James in closer for a kiss. Her arms floated around his neck with the utmost of ease. She appeared delighted, her ruby lips mere inches from his. Warm breath caressed his face like the soft flutter of a butterfly's wings, her half-lidded blue eyes trance-like crystals as she gazed at his earnest face. He was undeniably flattered by her attention; reveling her nearness, taking in her amiable attitude. He found his chest bumping lightly against the barrier of the prison bars as some eager part of his hidden self craved for something else other than black pain. Just before Maria's mouth made contact, James's body stiffened with guilt. He shouldn't do this, it's wrong, his mind backpedaled. It's so strange, but-

Feminine lips touched his and the dread creeping up his spine pressed further. Not because of the action of being kissed, but because enjoyment flowed through his veins like molten lava, searing and quick. It felt like an eternity since he reacted to a kiss -been kissed- by a woman. He forgot how the experience could be. Euphoric, gentle; feelings that had been locked away to the back of his mind, so far back in the darkness that they scared him. His head tilted up slightly, inextricably deepening the kiss. Maria's teasing fingers stroked the ends of his short hair, a small moan escaped her as hands grasped his shoulders all the more. His heart thundered painfully in his ears, body hot.

_This can't be Mary. Why am I kissing another woman? Why does it feel so good? Warm, so warm...It's been so long, Mary- _James jumped then, breaking off the kiss with such abruptness that it caused him to gasp loudly. He took air into his lungs, listening to the slamming of his heart against his ribcage. His body felt detached from his mind as he drew a blank in thought process.

"James honey, what's wrong?" Maria tried to reach for him, but he backed away fearfully.

_She's behind those bars,_ James's inner logic whispered. _She can't get me now._ "Please. I-I can't do this. I can't be this close," he stammered out.

Her mouth formed in a surprised O. "But I love you."

"No!!" James's head shook wildly, fists balling tightly. He wanted to go hysterical. "_Mary _did love me, but not you. Who _are _you? Tell me who you are!"

Calm, her voice smooth as silk, Maria purred, "I told you, whoever you want me to be."

Fantastic, more cryptic responses. "You're Maria," he stated aloud more to himself, trying to understand _anything_. "You...you look and sound exactly like my Mary, but you're not her." He half hoped she would agree.

"Can't you just accept that you can love somebody else? That another woman could love you? Like I do?"

James clutched his head, his breath coming on too fast. He was sure he was going insane. "_God, _why are you doing this to me, Maria- Mary?? Why are you gone?"

"I'm sorry you feel so confused. Please come closer. I want to help you." Maria held out her hands in supplication, her eyes worried.

"No, I-" Dizziness overcame him and he stumbled forward, aiming for the nearest thing to support himself. The chair he vacated earlier provided help, but his grip wasn't sturdy and he fell to the ground in a heap.

"James! Tell me you're all right! Tell me you care! Please come closer, I can't stand being unable to help you when you're like this." Maria's hands seized the iron prison bars rigidly, now looking desperate.

James snapped. He couldn't take anymore. His wife had been gone for three years and nothing was ever going to bring her back. What did it matter anymore where he got comfort from? Lights flashing crazily in his eyes, he struggled and dragged himself right up against those cold bars, the equally frigid floor seeping its numbing chill into his body. He was breathing heavily, his arms wrapped around himself as if to hold himself in place. He didn't realize he was freezing until Maria's warmth encircled around him, around his waist and across the back of his neck. The touch was awkward; the bars got in the way of any real closeness. Made it difficult for her to touch him.

But she was. And any warmth was better than the paralyzing ice hardening within.

- The End -


End file.
